Wouldn't Let Her Fall
by ncfan
Summary: "No one thinks of you as badly as you do." Renji isn't the only one to hold that opinion.


**Characters: **Ukitake, Rukia, Kaien.**  
Pairings: **onesided KaienRuki**  
Warnings/Spoilers: **Spoilers for Soul Society Arc.**  
Timeline: **Takes place during Soul Society Arc.**  
Author's Note: **I've always wondered what Ukitake and Rukia's relationship was. I thought they were probably rather close, as Yoruichi mentioned that the whole reason he was up near her cell when Yoruichi had to save Ichigo from Byakuya was to rescue her, unless my memory of that particular conversation has failed me.**  
Disclaimer: **I don't own Bleach.

* * *

A trace of a glimmer of the smell of that night lingers on. It wasn't musty or coppery like one would expect blood and death to be. Instead, it smelled like rain.

A sweet spring rain, cool and clear, was the only smell there was. That and the smell of his sweat and dying heartbeat, but in the end, the smell of rain drowned it out, filling her nostrils and clinging to her short, fine hair in crystalline droplets that weighed like lead and bruised her shoulders and battered her already beleaguered back, as he wrapped his arms around her and apologized in the last whisper he could give.

It still hurt, as if it had happened just yesterday.

Because Kaien had died regretting that he had ever dragged Rukia into it, regretting that he had drawn her into that cycle of agony and remorse, and all Rukia could think about as he died was his blood dribbling down under her collar. She couldn't even concentrate on trying to save him or talk to him. All she could do was uselessly whisper _"Kaien-dono"_, over and over again, until Rukia wasn't sure whether the wetness on her cheeks would be sweet or bitter when she tasted it.

Ukitake had pried her away from Kaien's body with surprising gentleness for a man who could only be described as a professional slayer of Hollows. Of course, after so many years of suffering through attacks of tuberculosis and raising tea cups to his lips with trembling hands, Ukitake had learned how to be gentle.

Rukia had surprised him that night. She hadn't run even though he had told her to; she usually took orders so much better than that. But where Kaien was concerned, Ukitake knew, Rukia was perfectly incapable of being rational.

It wasn't hard to see, when it happened right in front of Ukitake's nose. Personally, Ukitake had never been sure whether to classify Rukia's feelings towards Kaien as a crush, hero-worship, a sort of adoration common in younger siblings, infatuation or genuine love. Her consideration of Miyako and Rukia's impeccable sense of what was proper, combined with a natural shyness towards such matters, made it to where she never expressed those feelings, but still, Ukitake had to wonder.

And now, this.

_Ukitake shook his head, horribly weak at the knees. _Torn up inside, indeed.

_Rukia's small hands hung limply at her side, shaking and useless. Her slight shoulders trembled as she stared, white-lipped, at Kaien's immobile body._

"_Kaien-dono…" Her voice was the sort of voice Ukitake would have expected out of a broken china doll, if such a thing could talk. Her wide eyes were empty and huge in her face, the traces of ash blue circles forming before Ukitake's very eyes._

_Ukitake felt a painful shoot go up his chest, and he knew it wasn't from the tuberculosis._

"_Kuchiki." In that situation, Ukitake did the only thing he knew how that would bring her any measure of comfort, small as it would be. Rukia reminded him so much of one of his sisters when she had been small, after she had found the family cat dead in a bush on the grounds of their home, and he reacted the same way._

_Ukitake, with great care, pulled the tiny girl to his sunken chest as she continued to choke on her sobs, barely aware that she was not alone in that dark forest. Rukia would never have a father to do this for her, and her remote adopted brother would not do it no matter how much it rent his heart to see her in pain._

_Ukitake was the closest thing to the former, so it made sense to him to try to fill that role._

For Rukia, the memories after that were one dark blur, of leaving the forest, of insisting on carrying Kaien's body herself as she returned it to his family, of his young brother's expression, and of the long journey back to the division headquarters.

Ukitake knew, as only a captain and a mentor could know, that Rukia was, at some level, still in that dark forest, still cradling Kaien's fallen body, still crying, still holding a blood-soaked zanpakuto. And feared that she would never leave.

.

Ukitake sighed as he leaned against the column helping to hold the awning of the porch up, staring out into the garden. The dawn was just barely starting to break, streaks of deep aqua and even deeper pink coming as the sun started to lift its head over the horizon. A single bird uttered a harsh cry in the distance.

Rukia would face execution in a few hours, and Ukitake would have been lying to himself if he thought he could sleep. Nothing made sense; why was she being executed for an offense that would normally warrant banishment?

Now, he took action, with the aid of his comrade, brother-in-arms, fellow former classmate and pseudo-brother Shunsui, whom he had convinced to commit treason with him. Not that Shunsui had needed much persuasion.

_Yamamoto-soutaicho always claimed that Shunsui and I were like sons to him. He'll probably disown us after this, then. _Ukitake managed a small smile. _Oh, well. He still has a blood daughter in Unohana; he'll recover._

Rukia had given way under the strain entirely. Ukitake had visited her in her cell soon after her incarceration, and had been shocked to discover that she embraced execution with open arms. The guilt, it seemed, of Kaien and everything else, had remained long on after Kaien himself was dead and gone. He'd always known that, but for the first time, he had been forced to face it.

Byakuya's behavior infuriated him. _Family are supposed to look after their own_! he'd wanted to scream at him, and Ukitake would have lost his temper and screamed it at Byakuya if he hadn't been incapacitated by a coughing fit.

As a sibling, as an older sibling especially, Byakuya's behavior appalled Ukitake. Especially considering the fact that he knew that Byakuya did care deeply about Rukia.

Ukitake could remember Byakuya coming to him and coming as close as the man could to begging him not to give Rukia a position as a seated officer, fearing the danger she would be put in on the missions normally given to seated officers. Knowing Rukia's strength, Ukitake had acquiesced only out of compassion for Byakuya's worry.

Ukitake could also remember the first time Rukia had been injured on a mission. Byakuya had kept a long, lonely, sleepless vigil outside her room in the division as his sister laid unconscious on her bed inside, all night long. He had left only when Rukia woke up, and she couldn't help but notice the heavy circles under his eyes.

Ukitake knew Byakuya cared about his sister, so what on earth could possibly justify the way he was behaving now?

_A captain looks after their own too._ Ukitake folded his arms across his shoulders. _Especially when it's an emotionally starved little girl who's never gotten over her guilt and bears the weight of the world on her shoulders, by choice. Kuchiki needs all the looking after she can get._

"Hey." Shunsui stood beneath the shade of the porch, his serious lieutenant close behind. "Are you still up for this?"

Ukitake nodded solemnly. "I have no intention of changing my mind, Shunsui."

"Aright. At noon, then?"

"At noon."

_First thing on my to-do list for today:_

_Save Kuchiki Rukia from execution._

_Second thing on my to-do list for today:_

_Save Kuchiki Rukia from herself._


End file.
